A Huge Loss

For God commanded, "Honor your father and mother: and, he that curses father or mother; let him die the death" - Jesus (Matt 15:4)

I received a couple of questions about a recent article. about the above verse.

Question:

Not 100% sure your point... Based on the verses you noted, I get the impression that you are saying we should do what our parents say "period", even if we don't agree with them, otherwise we will not be blessed by God and miss his "perfect" plan. When parents are not looking out for their kids best interest are their children still supposed to do what they say?

On the car subject. We can try to get a "easy pass" by listening to others and our parents that have good advice, but at some point we have to become mature not leaning on the knowledge of others. The times that I have learned the most are when I have made mistakes and gained experience and maturity from them.

Answer:
We honor our parents by demonstrating how we value their love, experience, opinions and counsel. Children, who are adults, still have personal responsibility for their decisions and must still determine the best choice for their particular situation. Too often, children dishonor their parents by attacking their foundational values, minimizing their life experience, rejecting their love, and failing to seek their counsel.

Scripture encourages us to seek the advice of many counselors before going to war. Proverbs encourages each of us and especially young people (my definition of young keeps getting older) to seek wisdom by listening to God and to others with more experience. A person who makes decisions without getting counsel from those with more experience, demonstrate that they believe themselves to be wise. Scripture warns that those who believe themselves to be wise are actually fools. I've personally made too many decisions without seeking sufficient counsel and paid the price. As a result, I learned at a much greater expense than I wanted to pay. We can save a great deal of money, time and pain by learning from the experiences of others. Our parents usually have investment, objective interest, and love for us that other counselors lack. Our failure to recognize the value of their counsel will be a huge loss for us.

Do you see a man wise in his own eyes?
There is more hope for a fool than for him. (Proverbs 26:12)

The way of a fool is right in his own eyes,
But a wise man is he who listens to counsel. (Proverbs 12:15)

A Happy Landing

Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven.. – Jesus (Matthew 6)

A few years ago (or maybe it has been decades), when I was in college, I suddenly got the bug to get a sports car. Up to that time, I had survived without a car and had remained debt free through almost two years of college. In spite of that, all of the sudden, I couldn’t wait any longer for a sports car. My parents didn’t think it was a good idea, but I bypassed them and got my grandfather to loan me the money for a good used car. He, however, did not like the idea of a foreign car and pressured me into buying a nice, reliable car. So, I got a nice, reliable car. But, it was not a sports car and didn’t satisfy all of my desire.

A couple of years later, I was able to sell that nice, reliable car and get a loan from a car dealer to fulfill my desire for a sports car. About a year later, I had graduated from college and gotten married. Soon there was a baby on the way and my bride wanted to quit work. Something had to give financially and the only thing that looked optional was my SPORTS CAR. If I had kept the nice, reliable car, we could have enjoyed the conveniences of two cars. If I had listened to my parents, I could have finished college almost debt free. But, I had my desires and I found a way to satisfy them. Besides, it only took four or five years to completely pay off my college debts.

Another man had a great desire to minister full time to men. But, his father wanted him to first work for a few years in his business. This man reluctantly agreed to work with his father, but eventually committed to working in his father’s business for ten years. During those ten years, this man met his wife, got married, had children and began to develop a ministry to men. Now after 13 years, this man has an international ministry to men and to business.

Most of us can probably look back and see messes that we’ve gotten into because of not listening to our parent’s advice or not even seeking it. Some of us may still be suffering with the results of poor decisions. On the other hand, we may also have missed out on blessings because of our stubborn attitude. Today is a good day to re-examine our attitudes and to look at the results of our decisions. Many times we blame God for our problems when we sowed the seeds that are producing the harvest. It might also be a good day to bless or honor our parents for their attempts to help us even when we didn’t appreciate their efforts. But, whether we do that or not, we should be honest with God, our heavenly Father, about our past mistakes in ignoring His guidance and seeking our own desires. Today is a good day to change our mind and our approach to decisions. Just as in flying an airplane, the guidance we have on our approach to the runway is critical to a successful and happy landing.

“Listen to your father that begot you and despise not your mother when she is old.” (Prov 23:22)

“For God commanded, saying, Honor your father and mother: and, He that curses father or mother, let him die the death” – Jesus (Matthew 15:4)